Saturday, May 15, 2010

The Middle

Onward from the wedding...continuing with the surprise. We honeymooned in San Antonio, Texas. That in itself was an adventure. Just as we were pulling into the city limits, the transmission went out in my truck, affectionately known as, the Rover. I had always wanted a Land Rover and we bought a beat-up used one the year before. Actually, Robert surprised me with the Rover, knowing how much I wanted one, hating the mechanical complications that he knew would come along with the purchase.

This is a tiny picture of me, in the hills of Tennessee, with the Rover, tearing up some terrain.

Not really...that's what the Rover looked like, but that's not me. That's why the picture is so tiny. I'm not computer saavy enough to enlarge stolen photos. could have been me. One day. You never know. Whimper.

But I digress, the honeymoon was wonderful. We decided to stay, with our broken down truck, and finish out the week. It was easy to do since we stayed on the River Walk and could walk anywhere we wanted. Jazz clubs, boat rides down the river walk, souvenir shops, delicious cuisine, and a band from Peruvia that played everyday, at the main entrance. Who knew we both loved peruvian music?

My cousin drove to San Antonio at the end of the week to give us, me, Rob and the Rover, a six hour drive back to reality. And this is where I will start to give you the Reader's Digest version of the next four years, leading up to the great surprise. Seriously. I can't go on like this for six more months, pilfering little bits and pieces of those years, hear and there.

1. Rover got fixed and lasted for a couple of years, until I had an accident that totaled it. Whimper. I now drive a Malibu Maxx....yeah, baby! Did I mention it has satellite radio?
2. Son and girlfriend, complete with a five month old little girl, moved in merely months after we were married.
3. Youngest daughter, only 12 at the time, proclaimed that she hated us both.
4. Son and girlfriend proceeded down a very dark, Jerry Springer-like road for another year, moving in and out of our home.
5. Son and girlfriend became pregnant with my sweet grandson, little B.
6. Son and girlfriend got married in the backyard of my best friends home, neither one of them remember the nuptials. It was a horribly, sad wedding.
7. Grandson was born!
8. Son and new daughter-in-law moved back in, with now a 1 and 1/2 year old little girl and a newborn.
9. More Jerry Springer episodes ensued...many, many episodes.
10. Son and daughter-in-law left grandson with us at the age of 6 months for us to raise....just until they got back on their feet. It took awhile...he was with us full time for almost two years.
11. My Grandmother died.
12. Daughters grew into young womanhood, one started driving.
13. The youngest daughter hated me less, with only sporadic episodes of typical teenage hatred, while the oldest daughter blossomed.
14. Our boss, my husband and I work for the same man, drove us nearly to the brink of insanity.
15. Our old house, 75 years old, continued to deteriorate around our ears.
16. And really, the last 6 happened during the whole Jerry Springer episodes. More than once during those couple of years, my husband bailed my son out of jail in the middle of the night. And more than once, he went looking for our grandson when they disappeared with him. And more than once, he was reminded that he assumed a tremendous responsibility when he married me, and my brood. Yet, he stayed and never complained.
17. We struggled financially...who doesn't?
18. We adjusted to new married life, in the midst of all the chaos. Me, with my years of baggage and abandonment issues and anger. Him, with his years of baggage and abandonment issues and passive-aggressive ways.
19. My parents aged. My father became very ill, we thought we might lose him. He recovered.
20. We struggled financially.
21. My son and daughter-in-law finally got their lives together and started becoming the parents Little B deserved.
22. Daughters began emerging from teenage angst and became bearable functioning, human beings.
23. Started understanding my boss! Finally.
24. Started remodeling on the house! Finally.
25. Started getting a little ahead with our finances! Finally.
26. Worked through some past baggage issues with my passive aggressive, sweet husband.
26. Found out hubby has a daughter he never knew about from PREVIOUS relationship...wait? WHAT?

What the heck? I can tell you now, things are fine. But I can also tell you, it wasn't easy at first, folks. Because apparently I hadn't completely worked through number 26 like I thought. I was side-swiped! Ambushed! Bamboozled! We both were.

So...what have I learned? Oy-vey. I'm too tired to go into it now. But I will sum it up for you in my next post. It's all good...don't worry.

And here is a pretty picture of a flower to hold you over until I muster up the courage to tell you...the rest of the story. Rest in peace, Paul Harvey.

Ahhh, the Iris...pretty, isn't it?


Diahn said...

wow. that's quite a ride...sounds more like 24 years, doesn't it? :)

you've got a good man there, you know...

Lisa said...

I really like the list--each item a very long process. Like Diahn said, how could all of this happen in just a few years? Thanks for leaving us with the flower and the anticipation of your next post--I can't wait to read it.

willow said...

WT bought me a 96 Land Rover Discovery a few years ago because I always wanted one, too!! I LOVE that car.

sheri... said...

oh, my, goodness melinda! is it just me or have you lived three lifetimes in just a few years?? my heart ached with every twist in your road but i've got to tell you, i am anxiously waiting for your next chapter-post it quickly!! the faster, the better...a perfect 'let go, let God' moment :)

ANULAL said...

Nice post. Even your memories smell the love you experienced."true love is always inexplicable. For, the very moment you try to word it, it fills the voids that are necessary to make your sentences and expressions meaningful. True love never respects void."

Brian Miller said...

wow. you can at leaast say you have lived an interesting life...all we go through gets us to where we are, and where we need to be...

the riverwalk is amazing...

Dan Kent said...

Yes I needed the flower after that ride. And it is beautiful.

Check out Susana Baca - wonderful Peruvian vocalist. Heard her on PBS and bought 2 of her CD's. (Who needs to understand the words? The translations on the cases - beautiful poetry).

The story of a life - could it really happen any other way? Who would want just a saccharine existence anyway? (Well, we all would, I guess, with only the high points, but it just doesn't happen.) So this is the story of a life. Your life. The story that makes you who you are today.

The Crusty Crone said...

I love your writing style! Its so easy to read that here I am, several posts down already, ready for more.

I just wanted to acknowledge all of the living that's reflected in each of your numbered items. (Jerry Springer episodes... that description says it all, doesn't it.)

Should you be wondering, I came across your blog via Magpie Tales. I'm finding lots of interesting blogs.