There's nothing like realizing your parents are growing older to make you feel grown-up. It wasn't a gradual process for me, just kind of hit in me in the gut these past two weeks. My father had an apendectomy two weeks ago and is back in the hospital with complications. I'm sure he is going to be fine, however, it's frustrating. The whole process.
Seeing my bullet-proof, superhero father weak and unsure, sucks. Seeing the look in his eyes that backs up that unsureness...even worse.
Watching my mother come somewhat unglued because the person she loves most in the world is unsure, sucks equally.
And I wonder...when did this happen? I'm not ready for this. And even that statement is incredibly selfish, because I'm sure my parents aren't ready either. Or my brothers.
It's not a contest, who's ready, who's not. Simple truth is life sneaks up on you, ready or not. We're a family. We'll do what needs to be done to help each other out, we always have.
It's just strange...seems like just yesterday, my brothers, cousins and I were climbing the "forbidden" tree in Grandma's front yard, playing "quicksand" all over her house, and sneaking off to the "forbidden drainage ditch" just to get away from the adults, who sat around, and had boring, loud conversations while drinking endless cups of coffee.
I guess that's what our kids see now when they look at us.
Strange...on the inside, I still feel like that gangly, girl...unsure and out of place who just wants to sneak away.
I guess that's how my parents felt as they watched their parents aging.
I'm totally serious about all of this, but as I read these last few lines, I feel like Mufasa is going to leap from a mountainside and start singing "The Circle of Life", hyenas nipping at his tail.
I think it's time for bed.